Let's Educate the Hearing Community

This post is for the family members, friends, and colleagues who care about us.  By making just a few, small accommodations, they can vastly help us achieve a more normal quality of life. 

My first recommendation is to face us when you speak. We will probably use your facial expressions, gestures, and body language as cues. Be assured, that if you talk to us from another room or with your back to us, we will most likely ask you to repeat yourself.  If possible, please speak clearly and loudly enough (no shouting, please…it makes us feel badly). We are tired of smiling and nodding, giving the appearance that we’ve heard you.

In group situations, if you have any input on the seating arrangements, think “circular”, whether it is a round table in a restaurant or a seating arrangement for a book group meeting. It allows us to see and better hear all the participants.  However, if the seating is traditional, as in rows, perhaps you can set aside a few seats in the front for us.

If you are the speaker, it would be helpful to repeat each question that is asked, before answering them.  This might keep us from asking the same question 10 minutes later. If you have an opportunity to use a microphone, know that it will be much appreciated. Please be careful to hold it at a reasonable distance, so that your words are not muffled. Handouts, which give the gist or outline of the presentation, are also very helpful. Visual aids are always great!

At home, we hope you will be patient with us.  As Groucho Marx is credited with saying, “One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife.” We don’t want to frustrate our family by, for example, blasting the TV, so we may opt to use an assisted listening device.  My personal favorite accommodation is the use of closed captioning.  I assure you that the hearing members of the family will soon get use to ignoring the words on the screen. As for the telephone, that is a big challenge.  When you call us, please try to project as much as possible.  If you need to leave a message, especially your phone number, please, please, please speak s-l-o-w-l-y and clearly. All too often, we are forced to replay the message over and over in order to know how to return your call. 

 

In the workplace, our hearing issues sometimes make us feel diminished professionally, especially when there is a lot of background noise and conversing.  We always try our best, but hope that you will show tolerance and understanding if you sense we need to have something repeated.  At the end of each day, we want to leave our job feeling productive and part of the team.

All of these accommodations take very little effort, yet benefit all of us.  You don’t need to repeat as often, and we don’t need to embarrass ourselves asking you to do it.  It cuts down, if not eliminates, a lot of stress and shame that hearing impaired people often experience. It would be easy for us just to “tune out”, retreat into our own little world, and avoid the struggle, but that would not be fully living the one life we get.

Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine, so…..from the website of the ASL:

An older man had serious hearing problems for many years. He went to the doctor, and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed him to hear 100%.  The old man went back to the doctor in a month, and the doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect.  Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.” The man replied, Oh, I haven’t told my family yet.  I just sit around and listen to their conversations.  I’ve changed my will 3 times”.

Please pass this on to those who are willing to make a difference!